Dumped Boyfriend - You Aint Dead In The Water

If you've been a dumped boyfriend, I'm sure you're wondering what in the heck you should do now to get over your ex. You are more than likely feeling anger, resentment and hurt over the situation, but hey, you're a guy, so you don't want anyone to know.

First off, that's the wrong approach. There's nothing wrong with hurting when someone you love is no longer in your life, I'm not saying you should break down and sob in front of your friends, but unless your friends are complete jackasses they should be able to support you while you're going through this (and if not, maybe your first step should be to get some new friends).

Sometimes in life it's just as important to know what not to do as it is to know what to do. When you're trying to move past a tough breakup there are many things you just don't want to do, you'll only keep your own hurt alive that much longer and you can hurt other people too.

For example, don't hook up with other women. I know, this can help your wounded pride heal and it may take away a little of the hurt for a little while, but what about the other woman? Does she really deserve to be treated like a replacement for your ex? What has she ever done to you? No, it's best to just resist the urge to sleep with other women at least for a little while until you can do it for the right reasons and not just to build up your own ego, ease your hurt, or get back at your ex.

Another thing you need to avoid is the dumb macho posturing of going out and getting drunk. What does that really accomplish, it's such a juvenile thing to do. If you want to go out with your friends and have some fun to keep your mind off of things, than go for it. But if you want to go out and drink yourself into a stupor either avoid doing that or at least stay home where you won't make a fool of yourself and where you can't hurt anyone.

Instead of engaging in these destructive behaviors when you're a dumped boyfriend, try doing something positive that won't leave you feeling, and looking, like a jerk. How about joining a gym and getting in shape? Why not take a class or go back to school? Go visit your mother? It doesn't matter what it is for you, as long as what ever activities you choose to participate in are healthy and will eventually move you forward in life. They can help you take your mind off your ex, and your anger, and concentrate on something that is worthwhile, a two for one!

Avoiding the destructive behaviors after a breakup and improving the man you are will enable you to move forward in a positive way and will greatly increase the odds that your next relationship will work out better than your last one did. So if you're a dumped boyfriend take stock of the man you are and make improvements while you are healing over your breakup.